genesis

God had just told adam and eve not to eat from the tree in the middle of the garden, and they had just disobeyed him. the Lord began to roam the garden in search of adam. he called for him. and in genesis 3:10, adam says to the Lord, "i heard you in the garden, and i was afraid because i was naked, so i hid."

imagine how this grieved the Lord. his perfect creation, filled with with his very breath... adam had just recognized his nakedness, and was ashamed of it. he was ashamed of the beauty God had created.

sometimes i hear God, and i become afraid... because i feel naked. sometimes i feel like the things i'm doing to become closer to God don't quite cut the mustard. or, even worse, i'm not doing anything to become closer to the Lord, and i feel so awful, that i'd rather just hide out.

i'm always reminded of the constant struggle of sin, and choosing how to answer to it. genesis 4:7 "if you do what is right, will you you not be accepted? but if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it."

and as a human, i don't know what the heck that even means. how do i even begin to master sin? i don't think i can. i think mastering sin is what Jesus did on the cross. i must master my actions. and i can only do that through Him who strengthens me, and strengthen me shall!

genesis 6:5 "the Lord saw how great man's wickedness on the earth had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil all the time. the Lord was grieved... his heart was filled with pain."

i hope my heart will ache as much as my God's does when i sin against him.