Busy

Confession: I'm not that busy.

You probably aren't either, let's face it. I think it's hilarious when people say, "Sorry, I've been so busy!" But when you ask them what's up - really it just boils down to their 40 hour a week job. Which makes me think that all of this business of being busy is really just a status thing and/or we really fail at God's call for us to be still and know that he is... God.

I know that in New York City, it's really important to be busy and booked. If you're available for any random meet ups, it is almost weird; "Hmm... her cat must have died...." Your Instagram feed is cooler if you're out doing things every day and the more you're out, the more money you spend. Oddly enough, people think the more money you spend - the more money you have. 

We've become so accustomed to having "things" that when we don't have "things" it feels empty and maybe for some people, sad. I would argue that we are called to make space in our lives. I think about my family, my friends, and my marriage - and how I have to make space to be available. My relationships don't exactly thrive unless I'm making way for them to do so. If I want to abide in my relationships and to experience the amazing love and nurture of friendship, family, and marriage I can't deny every call or attempt at FaceTime when my sweet nieces and nephews want to talk. I can't say, "wait, wait!", every time my husband starts talking to me while I read a book. 

There's also this busy-ness in our minds that is frustrating. For my entire childhood and adult life, my dad has been the kind of person who can't even fall asleep because his mind just won't shut down. Even if he's not physically busy at the moment, his mind just keeps going and going. He's one of the smartest guys I've ever known - so that makes sense. But his busy mind also torments him. I can imagine that it would be annoying to constantly have your mind elsewhere.

I hope I'm always challenging myself to be available to those around me. When I'm gone, I don't want  my tombstone to say, "JOY LEÓN: SHE HAD A LOT OF STUFF TO DO". I want to be remembered for how much I gave to those around me and those far from me - both in the way of time and resources. I'm going to keep my calendar clear for that stuff.