Desire

I've been thinking a lot about the Bible and the concept of desire vs. follow through; and then that desire weighed against what we either know to be right as a part of some inner moral compass or what we believe the Bible to be.

In my lifetime, I've come across probably three different type of views on the Bible:

A) it's a collection of inspiring historical stories that, although not true, are great suggestions of how we should be (i.e. kind, patient, loving, generous...)

B) the Bible is absolutely true - it's just antiquated and doesn't apply to our current realities. No one stones criminals anymore, right???

or C) the Bible is the living and active word of God, applicable today as long as we are willing to be obedient to what it says and follow that truth.

My belief in and of the Bible falls into category C. The Bible is broken into two parts - the Old Testament and the New Testament. Reading part one (the OT) without reading part two (the NT) is sort of like watching the Count of Monte Cristo - filled with all of this corruption and sadness and pulling the plug on the TV right before you get to see all the redemption; checking out before the story is tied together and grace and mercy come in to save the day.

But this is what people do. The OT is incredibly brutal. It's an uncomfortable and sometimes incredibly boring book to read. It's a lot of long names, evil, circumcision and gross sex. It is! Then there's the NT - where Jesus comes in to start trying to piece together all the pieces of everyone's confusion and brokenness. The OT is law, law, law and the NT is love, love, love.

We all have an inner moral compass. I hear people call it a conscience or their "little voice". It's the generally quiet but oftentimes deafening feeling that says "do" or "don't" in your times of doubt. My inner compass is deeply connected to my belief in the Bible (see above option C). There have been tons of times I hear my compass tell me "NO!!" And I do it anyways. Thankfully there have been tons of times I listened, too.

But here's where this concept of desire comes in for me. My ultimate desire is for people to see my love for God displayed through my actions - especially how I treat other people. But sometimes my decisions are so opposite of my desire. I don't think this means my desire isn't strong enough, I just think it tells how strong our sin nature is. It's up to the people who raise us and surround us to show us a better way to live, act, and be. And then as adults, it's up to us to choose our attitudes. We have crappy or stressful jobs, problems in our family or marriage, not enough money in our bank account - and God calls us to a different way of living. When we follow Jesus, we're not living according to the money/success measuring stick. We are called to be joyful and grateful and to do everything without complaining. 

That's sometimes tough to implement, but it's not optional. It's not something we get to leave outside the perimeters of our Biblical beliefs because it's inconvenient or we're not sure how to actually go about it. When my husband attempts to make our bed, I'm not mad because it isn't right - I'm happy because he just keeps trying. Someday he'll get there. And someday I'll get there in a million other ways for him. 

Love is powerful because wrapped up inside the concept of love are all these incredible gifts like mercy, grace, forgiveness, kindness, generosity, joy, peace, and patience. If you aren't kind for a day or you lost your patience with your spouse or kid or friend, that doesn't mean you don't love them - it just means you're human and you have the desire to love but we fall short. We're figuring it out. 

Whew.