I've never been so aware of my need for constant forgiveness, new mercies, and keeping no record of wrongs as I am now in my first six months of marriage. All of the times I thought I was being spiritually refined and defined pale in comparison to the mysterious and beautiful challenge that marriage is now.
My husband is quick to forgive and has literally never kept a record of my wrongs (at least that he has revealed!). I can't think of a single time he has brought up a past transgression in the midst of a current battle. I am the worst in this offense. I throw cheap shots and immediately have to say I am sorry. But the quick apology has taken prayer & practice. It didn't happen overnight. And what's even better - sometimes I actually think BEFORE I throw the punch. I start the sentence and then say "nevermind" because it's like the little voice in my head (which, oddly enough sounds like a combination of my mom, Kara, and Lydia's voices???) screamed "NOOOO" and I was actually tuned in enough to listen.
Gosh if there's one thing I've learned about hearing wisdom it's - God/people can have the best idea ever, but if you're not on the right channel - fahgetaboutit. You'll never get a slice of it. You'll forever wonder why you don't make good decisions.
This Easter was really cool because I thought about how much God loves us - so much that he sent his son to die for our natural predilection to sin o'er and o'er again (throw cheap shots at your spouse...). I also thought about how friggin' big picture God is. Come on - don't sit there and try to tell me God isn't incredibly aware of the to tinsiest details while also just "getting" the largeness of everything at the same time. His resume has to have "ultimate plate spinner/multi-tasker" on there somewhere. The guy is good.
So not only did God let his kid take the heat for the rest of us for all of eternity, but he also let Jesus set the example. Example for what you ask? By that one selfless act of limitless love (dying on the cross), Jesus showed us what it really means to love everyone. No one is out of bounds. It's an all inclusive yet totally exclusive kind of love that we have a open ended invitation to participate in.
Even if you don't actually believe in Jesus; even if you don't believe that the Bible is anything but a collection of great yet fictional stories, are you not inspired to move on that kind of love? A story or character doesn't have to be true for me to be inspired. Jo from Little Women is a fierce girl who knows her way around a page and pen. She writes and she writes and moves to New York City with no one else and ends up meeting her husband there. Sound familiar? Now to only talk my husband into naming any future daughter Jo...
So you're sitting there and thinking - but I don't believe in God or Jesus so why would I buy into this weird story of him being killed on a cross and then coming back to life? Ok, don't believe that if you don't want to - your loss. But imagine the kind of love that would let that happen. You watch the Notebook and imagine what that kind of passion and love would look like in your life, so try imagining with this.
This kind of love completely changes you. The imagination or thought that that kind of love ever existed or better yet, could even exist, is revolutionary to the way you carry yourself. I've known people who have changed their whole career, moved to a different city or country or continent, adopted a kid, or given away their money from being inspired by that love.
My family, my marriage, my friendships, the way I ride the freaking train... It's all inspired by the thought that there was Jesus who was willing to die so I could live. Well, there goes my seat on this 45 min train ride. Jesus was nailed to a cross, so I'm pretty sure the lady with a cane can have my seat.
Let your feet move on this imagination. Test your motives and weigh your decisions against this kind of love. Use it as a marker in your arguments - your petty battles and your bad attitudes. You'll never be the same.
My husband is quick to forgive and has literally never kept a record of my wrongs (at least that he has revealed!). I can't think of a single time he has brought up a past transgression in the midst of a current battle. I am the worst in this offense. I throw cheap shots and immediately have to say I am sorry. But the quick apology has taken prayer & practice. It didn't happen overnight. And what's even better - sometimes I actually think BEFORE I throw the punch. I start the sentence and then say "nevermind" because it's like the little voice in my head (which, oddly enough sounds like a combination of my mom, Kara, and Lydia's voices???) screamed "NOOOO" and I was actually tuned in enough to listen.
Gosh if there's one thing I've learned about hearing wisdom it's - God/people can have the best idea ever, but if you're not on the right channel - fahgetaboutit. You'll never get a slice of it. You'll forever wonder why you don't make good decisions.
This Easter was really cool because I thought about how much God loves us - so much that he sent his son to die for our natural predilection to sin o'er and o'er again (throw cheap shots at your spouse...). I also thought about how friggin' big picture God is. Come on - don't sit there and try to tell me God isn't incredibly aware of the to tinsiest details while also just "getting" the largeness of everything at the same time. His resume has to have "ultimate plate spinner/multi-tasker" on there somewhere. The guy is good.
So not only did God let his kid take the heat for the rest of us for all of eternity, but he also let Jesus set the example. Example for what you ask? By that one selfless act of limitless love (dying on the cross), Jesus showed us what it really means to love everyone. No one is out of bounds. It's an all inclusive yet totally exclusive kind of love that we have a open ended invitation to participate in.
Even if you don't actually believe in Jesus; even if you don't believe that the Bible is anything but a collection of great yet fictional stories, are you not inspired to move on that kind of love? A story or character doesn't have to be true for me to be inspired. Jo from Little Women is a fierce girl who knows her way around a page and pen. She writes and she writes and moves to New York City with no one else and ends up meeting her husband there. Sound familiar? Now to only talk my husband into naming any future daughter Jo...
So you're sitting there and thinking - but I don't believe in God or Jesus so why would I buy into this weird story of him being killed on a cross and then coming back to life? Ok, don't believe that if you don't want to - your loss. But imagine the kind of love that would let that happen. You watch the Notebook and imagine what that kind of passion and love would look like in your life, so try imagining with this.
This kind of love completely changes you. The imagination or thought that that kind of love ever existed or better yet, could even exist, is revolutionary to the way you carry yourself. I've known people who have changed their whole career, moved to a different city or country or continent, adopted a kid, or given away their money from being inspired by that love.
My family, my marriage, my friendships, the way I ride the freaking train... It's all inspired by the thought that there was Jesus who was willing to die so I could live. Well, there goes my seat on this 45 min train ride. Jesus was nailed to a cross, so I'm pretty sure the lady with a cane can have my seat.
Let your feet move on this imagination. Test your motives and weigh your decisions against this kind of love. Use it as a marker in your arguments - your petty battles and your bad attitudes. You'll never be the same.
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