seventeen candles

february twenty-third. not only the day amazing grace came out (ahem), but my seventeenth birthday...

this year, i felt like i was turning some age that i really didn't want to be. this was the first year i saw my dad turn an age that he actually made an issue of (fifty). i've never heard him complain about getting old, or feeling old. but this year, fifty seemed to be just so different to him.

and seventeen, although not old, seemed very empty to me. the in between age. seventeen is like the weird feeling middle child. that awkward waiting year. right after you can get your license, right before you can smoke (i mean... become an "adult").

but then, as i kept approaching this birthday with such low expectancy, i took a sharp turn of my mindset. i decided that i was going to expect a ton from this year. that this could be a fantastic year. so much could happen. and that i needed to look upon this year with great anticipation and hope for what God could be doing in and through me.

i want to do so much. i want to impact so much. and there's no way i can do it on my own. there's also no way i can do it, if i let the constant barrier of inadequacy keep me from my potential in Christ.

redeem me from the oppression of men, that i may obey your precepts. psalm 119:134

i believe that's a good prayer over my seventeenth year.