skateland

well, i was about to write something, and then i looked at the total views i had on my blog and it says, "669". that means i've had six hundred and sixty-nine chances to make an impression on someone.

that's kinda weird to me. how many of these impressions have been lasting? how many of these impressions have been good?

last night i had a dream that i was walking through my grandma's living room, and i saw my grandpa (who died a few years ago). every time i think of my grandpa, i think of two things. one being the fact that he was the scrawniest, sweetest old man ever, yet he ate every single person's food. he couldn't stand to see waste. he would eat everyone's food - even soggy cereal. and two, i think of this one day that we had arrived in kansas city, and we went to my grandparent's house - and i was talking to my grandpa and i told him that i liked to skate, and he said, "well then, let's go to skateland." and i said, "really? you mean it?" and he said, "i promise."

the next year he died, and we never went to skateland. i've still never been to skateland. i see it... everytime i go back there, and everytime - i think of that conversation with my grandpa.

anyway ... [in my dream] i saw my grandpa, and i embraced everything i missed.

and all of the sudden, as i was hugging him, i was flooded with wistful thinking.

i'm awake now, and i'm still filled with the same longings...

oh how i wish i would have taken advantage of my grandpa's wisdom.

he has left such an impression on me, and i haven't even realized it.

i haven't realized how much i've missed him - until my dream last night.

surprisingly enough, life is more than a blog, and i've made more than six hundred and sixty-nine impressions on people.

and i still haven't gone to skateland.