i love that and hate it at the same time. i love it as a book title (you steal it, you die), but sometimes hate the fact that it is so freaking true. well really i only hate it when it hurts, but on the other side of the hurt - i love it!
i often talk about how for the past few years i have put myself in a separate container from the Lord. he was in a box, i was in a box, and my plans were in the box with me. i somehow separated every aspect of my life: my relationship, my future dreams, my family, my situations, etc... and the lid was on tight.
my greatest fear was losing everything in my container, so i wouldn't let the Lord in. i let him into some parts and even so i kept him in the shallow end of said parts. he was in the baby pool and everyone and everything else was diving in the deep end of my heart.
i see so many people my age, younger than me, and even older than me living in some delusion that they are entitled to things like spouses, kids, happy jobs, etc... yet completely compartmentalizing their relationship with the Lord. and i cringe thinking of all of the heartbreak that lies ahead for them. i was there, and it wasn't fun. too many sleepless nights filled with tears and agony over what i could have done differently or how i could have salvaged anything.
nothing changed for me until i was able to admit to God that nothing i had going for myself was as good as what he could help me accomplish if i pursued him and his will as much as i had pursued me and my own.
in 'land or sea', sleeping at last says, "change is a direct result of our plans". and they couldn't be more right. every plan that i thought was good and God-honoring was really just a tiny wish that i couldn't see at the time wasn't what i really wanted or needed.
i love that God only cared about my old plans in the way that it relates to completely ditching them and giving me a new set of things to pursue that leave me peaceful and incredibly elated to be living each day.
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