the sort of life for which we were created

i was recently inspired by my great play-reader of a sister-in-law to check out tennessee williams's the catastrophe of success. don't be scared to read it - it's a short essay you can find online. i would definitely encourage you to do so. some really good things in there.

this stuck out to me:

The sort of life that I had had previous to this popular success was one that required endurance, a life of clawing and scratching along a sheer surface and holding on tight with raw fingers to every inch of rock higher than the one caught hold of before, but it was a good life because it was the sort of life for which the human organism is created.

i have always identified with people who are older than me. i think because i only had one younger sibling and four older ones - and my family was just different. what my parents lacked in the "you have to get an A on this test or you're grounded." (no version of that would have ever, EVER been spoken in my house) area they made up for in the, "find what you love doing and do it!" area.

despite what people may think about me and the stuff i've acquired or the cozy place i live or the things i support or go out and do - my dad doesn't send me a check. i work for it. and my brothers and their wives work hard to create families and homes that are inviting.

i never much liked hanging out with my age group because even now - now that we're in our twenties, i get so tired of people who just don't want to try. they want to float through life doing whatever makes them "happy" with no foresight into the future or participation in something that's bigger than themselves. it's exhausting to be around this type. to lazily go from one activity to the next and chalk it all up to "being in our twenties" and "only living once!" - yikes. sounds icky to me. where's the generosity? where's the pursuit of meaning?

maybe that's why i love living in this city. because even though there are still pockets of those people who get rent checks from their sugar daddy and live to party - the majority of us have a knowledge that you have to work your ass off in order to live here. so you better really love it. otherwise you're just working for nothing. and i love living in a place where everyone has this sense of loyalty to where they call home. we own this loyalty because we've changed the way we live just to - live.

that's absolutely not to say you can't pursue generosity and purpose outside of this city - i 100% think you can and see my family and some of my friends doing it now. and that's why i choose to do life with these people. because i love that pursuit of purpose.

this life of work and pursuit - it really is what we were made for. so i never want to get the idea of resting in God's love and resting in my pursuit of God muddled. because they're reeeeal different, ya'll.