good ole' m&d

sometimes i envy the 'relational permanence' that my parents seem to possess. i was writing about this very thing in a letter to a dear friend yesterday...

both my dad and mom seem to have this rock steadiness (now i can't get aretha out of my head...) to them when it comes to the way they live out their relationships and their relationship with one another. they seem unmovable. like a marriage or parental mountain. one that will never stop loving you or telling you that you are awesome.

all growing up i heard this told to my older brothers, over the past few years i've heard it directed at myself, and now i hear it pointed in my little brother's direction: we want you to do whatever you are passionate about. so if that means school, awesome. go. or if that means moving to india, cool. go. but if that means living at home and eating our food... that is lame, but fine. if you're passionate about keeping the same address, suit yourself. (that response would be more from my dad - my mom's would fall more along the lines of, 'yes! and get married and have babies and still live with us! never move! and marry someone who can cook!')

my parents have made a huge point of focusing on us as individuals and us as people longing to seek out a God who is even more passionate about us than our earthly father. they have never cared (and thank God for this) whether i brought home an F or an A - as long as i could carry on an engaging conversation with someone, and as long we were funny (that wasn't a requirement, it was just a strong preference).

and in turn this has made me look at them and see people who truly want what's best for me - and admit that they probably don't know what that is... so they aren't going to be as ridiculous to think that an A on a math test is going to bring me what's best.

i see their marriage and the family they have built together and think - it must be nice to wake up every morning knowing you have someone to do life with and knowing you have fostered the upbringings of six pretty damn cool kids, who have in turn brought other great people into the family and this cycle continues..

for a while i had been envying all of these things - feeling like the opportunity for me to experience such profound meaning within the context of initiating my own family with someone had perhaps been taken away - but i can say (truthfully), for the first time in my life might i add, that i am so happy to be trusting in a God that sees beyond the beginning point. the halfway point. and the three quarters of the way point.

in the meantime, i am really happy to hang out in the living room with my dad talking about theology and friends and life and weird crap. because my parents are seriously cool.

and i also like it when he pays for my dinner.